The Dog days are here!!!!!!! I noticed something extraordinary today. On my daily visit to the florist, to pick up madre's consignment of flowers that would pave the way for another favour from the GUY who makes the world go round, I saw Shelby sniffing around the basket of roses, that the florist displays every evening. Now this was funny for two reasons, firstly, Shelby to me always appeared to be the nonchalant sort of guys girl, not into the histronics of anything mainstream like, cleanliness, food in a bowl you know, the works, yet here she was sniffing around like a pro trying to pick a flower. Secondly it was that time of the day when nikhil the neighbour's five year old son begins his evening snack while watching Shelby boss her little brats around, presumably to try and get them to start their daily home work or something ( Home work could range between chasng Swamy, the watchman to ripping to shreds the new car covers nikhil's mum idiotically buys everytime ).
So the question remains who was she trying to sneek the flower for??? colloquially who's the lucky Dog??? My sources ( ma and Chorda ) tell me, she's been necking this new stray on the block. But maybe it's for her old flame Dolby??? Who knows..the point remains, Even Shelby's been taken in by that stupid consumerist holiday...DRAT!!!
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Friday, January 20, 2012
On the Wrong Side of Twenty
Disclaimer : this is going to be a long rant about the woes of twenty something single girls ( read women ) in our fair land India. So if your not a twenty something girl single or otherwise consider yourself LUCKY. not just LUCKY actually bleeding saw a leprechaun and will have the same luck for the next century grade of LUCKY.
When I turned 20, my parents looked at me promisingly. Here I was at the threshold of adulthood, old enough to travel by auto rickshaw alone...after eight ( no reference to the mint ). Old enough to cook up a storm in the kitchen ( which I don't..how many of us do really????) and generally in my case to have a cell phone. Cut to the big 25...suddenly, ambitions are long forgotten, aspirations are cast aside and everything, from the new hair cut, to the weight, to the choice of food and clothing are all potential deal breakers or makers...What is this deal that i refer to? It's the only legal form of slavery that still exists ...MARRIAGE.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to marriage , ( well not most of the time anyway ) but what is the deal with age and marriage???Here we are the at the precipice of new beginnings, a new job, or promotions at the old job. New Careers , the desire to see the world, and for some reason the full stop to all the above is the topic of Marriage.You know something is wrong when all people see when they lay eyes on you is a walking talking invitation card for the next food filled matrimonial disaster.
Oh, and if your single, that's another ball game altogether, your almost an untouchable. So what if your heart was broken so badly it never healed. So what if who you think is your soul mate, only makes art house bengali movies and is 40 years your senior, the fact that your 25 and still depend on your parents to eventually find a match for you can bring out an audible sigh from even the most hypocritical possessive mothers.
So to all the Auntyji's and Uncleji's who are dying to see their friends friends friends daughter married and well settled so that they can tuck into another one of the oh so lavish meals that i need an ENO just to get through the night, STOP IT. Stop treating us like some cattle, waiting to sold in the market. Stop telling us that we will look older than our husbands at the wedding because you know na...girls MATURE FASTER...and stop really STOP using the line " AT YOUR AGE BETA I WAS MARRIED WITH 2 KIDS " You also thought jeetendra was a super star and that Sunny Deol could act. so, there's a lot to be said about your thought process.
When I turned 20, my parents looked at me promisingly. Here I was at the threshold of adulthood, old enough to travel by auto rickshaw alone...after eight ( no reference to the mint ). Old enough to cook up a storm in the kitchen ( which I don't..how many of us do really????) and generally in my case to have a cell phone. Cut to the big 25...suddenly, ambitions are long forgotten, aspirations are cast aside and everything, from the new hair cut, to the weight, to the choice of food and clothing are all potential deal breakers or makers...What is this deal that i refer to? It's the only legal form of slavery that still exists ...MARRIAGE.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to marriage , ( well not most of the time anyway ) but what is the deal with age and marriage???Here we are the at the precipice of new beginnings, a new job, or promotions at the old job. New Careers , the desire to see the world, and for some reason the full stop to all the above is the topic of Marriage.You know something is wrong when all people see when they lay eyes on you is a walking talking invitation card for the next food filled matrimonial disaster.
Oh, and if your single, that's another ball game altogether, your almost an untouchable. So what if your heart was broken so badly it never healed. So what if who you think is your soul mate, only makes art house bengali movies and is 40 years your senior, the fact that your 25 and still depend on your parents to eventually find a match for you can bring out an audible sigh from even the most hypocritical possessive mothers.
So to all the Auntyji's and Uncleji's who are dying to see their friends friends friends daughter married and well settled so that they can tuck into another one of the oh so lavish meals that i need an ENO just to get through the night, STOP IT. Stop treating us like some cattle, waiting to sold in the market. Stop telling us that we will look older than our husbands at the wedding because you know na...girls MATURE FASTER...and stop really STOP using the line " AT YOUR AGE BETA I WAS MARRIED WITH 2 KIDS " You also thought jeetendra was a super star and that Sunny Deol could act. so, there's a lot to be said about your thought process.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Shelby, her three kids and the other Guy
They came into my world on a stormy November night. Quietly whimpering in the cold brazen rain. Trying to snuggle unsuccessfully into her while still getting wet. Who's she?. she's Shelby, the stray who sun's herself in front of our gate everyday between one and four looking lovingly at her brats.Who are they? They are the brats, Shelby brought them into the world one very windy day in early November.
I'm not particularly dog friendly , some would say quite the opposite actually but that rainy day even I couldn't help myself.There they were cowering in the cold, waiting to be hugged, to be loved. Though I didn't do either, all credit to the madre and her fearless younger son, who promptly took action and rescued Shelby and her brats, they did give me premature ventricular contractions...( I skipped a heart beat ).
And since that day, Shelby stopped eating our garbage, growls everytime there is an unsightly person around, respectfully walks away when the padre or I use the gate and faithfully follows her two saviors from the main road to the gate. The brats still play around, spewing garbage all around the street, and they even tore up our car cover, playfully of course the madre observed, of course had any of her children been responsible for the same, we would probably have had to miss dinner.
And now as mentioned in the title the Other Guy. Recent observations of Shelby have led me to believe that she is currently dating the supposedly eligible Dolby ?( as I like to call him ). He's big, spotted and belongs to the neighbor. Don't think the brats are too excited, I saw him chasing them around the main road just the other day. But hopefully that will soon die down, and Shelby will find true love, but just in case she will always have her gate, the box that lies still in our garage which for one day was her shelter and my love, that I'm still scared to show but have deep within my heart for her nevertheless.
I'm not particularly dog friendly , some would say quite the opposite actually but that rainy day even I couldn't help myself.There they were cowering in the cold, waiting to be hugged, to be loved. Though I didn't do either, all credit to the madre and her fearless younger son, who promptly took action and rescued Shelby and her brats, they did give me premature ventricular contractions...( I skipped a heart beat ).
And since that day, Shelby stopped eating our garbage, growls everytime there is an unsightly person around, respectfully walks away when the padre or I use the gate and faithfully follows her two saviors from the main road to the gate. The brats still play around, spewing garbage all around the street, and they even tore up our car cover, playfully of course the madre observed, of course had any of her children been responsible for the same, we would probably have had to miss dinner.
And now as mentioned in the title the Other Guy. Recent observations of Shelby have led me to believe that she is currently dating the supposedly eligible Dolby ?( as I like to call him ). He's big, spotted and belongs to the neighbor. Don't think the brats are too excited, I saw him chasing them around the main road just the other day. But hopefully that will soon die down, and Shelby will find true love, but just in case she will always have her gate, the box that lies still in our garage which for one day was her shelter and my love, that I'm still scared to show but have deep within my heart for her nevertheless.
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